Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo Challenges Gender Roles in Marriage
“It’s Not Biblical for Man to Take Care of a Woman” – Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo
Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo, the lead pastor of David’s Christian Centre and a well-known relationship coach, has sparked conversations across the Christian community with his bold statement: “It’s not biblical for a man to take care of a woman.”
According to him, the cultural belief that men are solely responsible for the financial and material well-being of women does not align with the principles of Scripture. While society often expects men to “carry the full weight” of provision, Pastor Okonkwo insists that God’s Word paints a different picture.
Understanding the Biblical Context
In Genesis, God created both man and woman in His image and gave them joint responsibility to “be fruitful and multiply, fill the earth and subdue it.” The instruction was not given to man alone but to both. Pastor Okonkwo emphasizes that from the beginning, God designed partnership, not dependency.
He argues that when people twist provision into a one-sided responsibility, it distorts God’s plan for marriage. While husbands are called to love, lead, and provide, wives are also empowered to work, manage resources, and contribute to the home. Proverbs 31 describes a virtuous woman who is industrious, entrepreneurial, and supportive of her family.
The Danger of Misinterpretation
Pastor Okonkwo warns that many young women enter marriage with unrealistic expectations, believing that a man’s role is to “take care” of them completely. He notes that this mindset can create unnecessary strain on men, especially in today’s economic realities, and rob women of their God-given potential to be fruitful and productive.
Instead of viewing marriage as a “rescue mission,” he teaches that both husband and wife are to complement each other, pooling their strengths and resources for the good of the family and the kingdom of God.
Balancing Provision and Partnership
Of course, the pastor is not denying that men should be providers. Scripture makes it clear that a man who refuses to provide for his household has “denied the faith” (1 Timothy 5:8). However, he clarifies that this provision does not mean women should sit idle, waiting to be “taken care of.”
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The heart of his message is balance: a godly man provides leadership, love, and covering, while a godly woman brings wisdom, resourcefulness, and strength into the home. Together, they reflect the unity and productivity God intended.
Final Thoughts
Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo’s statement may be controversial, but it invites Christians to return to the Word of God rather than cultural stereotypes. Marriage was never designed to be a one-sided burden, but a partnership rooted in love, responsibility, and shared purpose.
His reminder challenges both men and women: instead of asking “Who will take care of me?” the right question is, “How can we take care of each other and fulfill God’s purpose together?”
Content Credit | Olaoluwa Ayomide
Image Credit | google.com